How would you feel and what would you do if half of your heart and three-quarter of your soul were taken away from you? You get lost and try to find yourself. You feel empty and try to fill it up.
I released my clasp on my whole self. It was not even in a gradual manner. It was abrupt that one day, I don’t know myself anymore. I suddenly saw life in a different way. I wanted to live life in another way.
The moment this heart was cut in half and only 1/4 of my soul was left in my body, I have become outrageous. I’ve taken advantage of the freedom I obtained. I explored. I tried new things. I met new people. I went to the other side of the world. I crossed the line. It made me ecstatic... Very ecstatic! But for a short time. I thought it was the thing that I’ve been looking for. I was wrong.
I felt like I went into the woods, seeking myself or maybe just out of nothing. I got tired then opted to go home, but could’t find the way out. I felt like I jumped out of the aircraft at 20,000 ft. I could see the whole world, but did not know where to land.
I hate myself for feeling this way. I am on the right path, but I feel lost. I am loved by many, but I feel empty. I cannot detect traces of tranquility and certainty.
2018 has just come. Hopefully, I’ll be able to redeem myself. And don’t worry... I always ask God for His guidance. I know I’ll be fine...
