I pushed the door. The breeze kissed my skin right away. It was cold, I guessed? But my head was boiling up inside that turned cool breeze into nothing in just a snap. I felt queasy as I walked out of the bar. Heavy head. I knew there were many people moving through, but I was seeing the image spinning.
I headed to the parking lot to look for my car. I was too wasted I stumbled about. Did I get hurt? No. Numbness, what do you expect? I breathed heavily, then lay on my back.
On the spur of the moment, a twinkling up above captured my attention. The spinning image became blurry. I was trying to figure out what it was... until clear sky happed.
I got stupefied! The round and bright moon was beautifully hanging high in the sky, surrounded by bright white stars. Such a wonderful starry sky! My world stopped. The busy area hushed. Numb, yet a pinch of sanguinity was twirling in me.
A few more minutes, I heard a big, loud voice from the open parking lot, "What are you doing here?" A familiar face sprang upon my face. His head covered the scenic panorama of the bright sky. "Get up", he was shouting while grabbing my right hand. "This is a parking lot, not a bedroom where you can just lounge. Do you wanna get hit by a car?", he scolded me.
"The moon and stars look very wonderful. I just wanna stare at them until they're gone. Lying here makes me forget the world", I answered as I eyed the most lustrous star above.
Shaking his head, he sat beside me. He took off his biker's jacket and placed it on my thighs. "Be still but don't let others spot that floral fabric underneath", he jokingly said. I was wearing a red fitted dress. Smile was seen on my face. Him, witty!
Gabriel knows how hard-headed I could be, especially when I battle with depression.
Suddenly, he lay on my right side. I was so surprised. He then stared at the sky. I thought he would utter compliments about it. But...
"You do not drink. Worse, you let yourself get drunk. What happened?", he drily asked.
I did not want to speak. I was just looking straight at this person who sprawled on the dusty pavements of the parking lot to join my absurd idea, without hesitations.
From having gazed up, Gabriel turned his head to the left. "Why did you drink? Tell me", he repeated.
"You know what?", I began. I looked up again. "If Simon finds me lying here, he would ask me to arise. If I insist, he would prolly leave. Yes, he would be worried about me, but of course he cares more for himself. Thus, you would see him running to the next club. You know, to entertain himself," I continued. "I have nothing against it because I fully understand how he feels. He is the fall guy... the sufferer... the victim," I closed my eyes for a while and took a deep breath. "He would let me lie in this chaotic world," I crossly said.
Silence...
"Gab, I also hurt you, remember?" I recalled. "A lot! I cheated on you. I blew all the sacrifices you made for me. I destroyed all our dreams, your dream," I said. Tears started to fall.
I raised my voice, "I deeply fell in love with another guy, though I was engaged to you. I ran away from our wedding ceremony! I betrayed you!"
He was very still. I wondered what he was thinking.
"I do not understand. Despite the misery I gave you, you are still here beside me," I said with my whipping voice. "Why can't you leave me? Why can't you turn your back on someone stupid who broke your heart and dreams?", I sobbed
"You are stupid more than you think," heavy words uttered by calm lips. "You brought everything to nought. You jilted me in front of the altar, in front of our loved ones. You ruined all the things we planned and we dreamt of. You made me feel like I'm a trash," he imperturbably said.
How could he keep such composure when he speaks from an aching heart?
"That is my point!", I answered as I moved upward to sit down. "I treated you like a trash and you're still here," I angrily said. Dizziness started to be felt.
"I'm okay here, alright? I can go home by myself. Leave me now", I commanded him.
"I will not," he calmly responded.
"I am stupid. But you are more stupid for staying next to me!", I yelled.
Hard-headed Gabriel did not listen. He was still lying there, staring up above. But apparently, he was controlling his tears from falling.
I was badly pissed off. My head got heavier and heavier. I was experiencing terrible vertigo. I lost my energy. "Why do you choose to stay?", I whispered.
He sat down. "First, you are a woman, drunk, and incontrollable. I am mad at you, but it does not mean I could just ditch you in times like this, in a place like this. Second...", he paused
"Yes, I am so so so mad at you," he emphasized. "Lying on a parking lot is completely lame. But you told me, doing so makes you forget the world. And I also want to forget everything. Forget what happened, forget what we're told. I am not sure how this incredibly irrational idea would work but...", he was stuttering.
He gulped and said, "Being with you makes me forget the pain. I am hurting, but being with you gives me bliss."
When he bowed his head, I knew he was crying already. And so did I. I was hardly crying, I was about to faint.
"You look pale. You need to get home", he said. He stood up and carried me.
The last thing I could remember is... I threw up all over his shirt when he carried me.
I feel a hammering headache now and my stomach is in pain. So, this is what hangover is huh?
I better call my sister and ask what happened last night.
