Finally

Lately, I've been busy driving and roaming around town with my family. Hence, I have no time to hit the internet and update my accounts. Here's the fresh achievement I got.

I am now a DEGREE HOLDER, ESCOLARIAN ALUMNUS, and OFFICIALLY UNEMPLOYED. Lol!  

Thanks be to Allah! ❤

Pabasa 2012

Pabasa is a Filipino Catholic tradition, but specifically is a reading-and-chanting ritual during lent season. People narrate the text on the passion, death, and resurrection of Christ. There are also food being served to those who visit the station. As everyone knows, I am a Muslim yet aware of some Catholic traditions.

Every year, I participate during and somehow embrace Pabasa because our family sponsors the food. The past years, Pabasa had no great shakes to me. It was just ordinary day. But I never expected that this year's Pabasa would be this amazingly exceptional. The 3-day Pabasa turned out to be a collection of getting-closer moments with folks in our barangay. I personally had a chance to form close ties with the youth here. I even realized how time does a runner so fast. I was able to meet my childhood friends and did catch up.

I was wearing simplicity on my sleeves within those 3 days. I mean, no fab and glam. I visited 5 Pabasa stations in our town through feet and not by wheels. I wore slippers, and not glittering heels. I was at my simplest, but I felt everything was exceptional. The reason behind it was the people I was with. We played bingo, we went to Perya, we had chitchats, and a lot more. Those were sleepless nights but just plainly conversing and laughing with them made my soul feel awake.

The Pabasa was so quick. So, I'm missing it right now. I miss the beautiful Pabasa station, those wonderful and fun-to-be-with people, and the yummy food! Haha! The sad fact is I'll be experiencing Pabasa again after 2 years.

They come. They go.

As they say, people come and go. Someone that we love one day, can disappear from our lives the next. Perhaps because of distance, fights, and/or loss of communication. This is when we suppose life is very unfair.

Every educational stage ends with a graduation. When you graduate, it means you accomplished a certain stage and ready to face another crossroad. Yes, I believe graduation is not the end for it is the beginning. But sometimes, I do not. Sometimes, I see it as a sign that I will no longer see people whom I am with in an institution.

Way back in high school, I was able to create a wonderful friendship with my classmates and some schoolmates. Hence, it was hard to let go of them when I had to pursue my studies in the Philippines. Now, I am soon to move out of my college life, and I feel like IT IS EVEN HARDER FOR ME TO LET GO. Probably because I experience this stage with a mature mind and my heart is entailed. This is where you encounter different things, if not, all things a person should see. So memories are fixed in my mind!

Sometimes I wonder... In every stage, you meet friends and become close to them. When this stage has to end,  there is a tendency you leave your friends behind. And when you enter a new one, you have to make friends with others and become close once more. Then, this stage has to end again. It is a cycle, but a painful one. The event occurs and repeats itself in the same sequence, but not with the same people anymore.

In exactly 11 days, our graduation ceremony will be held. This terribly gives me poignancy. I gained a lot of friends in my school, whether it be classmate or school employee (faculty members, janitors, security guards, people in the canteen, etc.). What makes it even bluer is the fact that these people are like family to me and we are about to be torn apart.

They come. They go. Can you just come and never go? May I just take everyone to my next crossroad? Pretty please?! I wish I could hold close each of them before I leave CEU.

___________________________________

Allow me to share photos taken during and after our Baccalaureate Mass and Sampaguita Interlude:

Halt For A While

All eyes on me as I dramatically walk along the entire perimeter of the runway. I am draped with a stunning dress and feet are covered with splendid stilletos. Crowd applauds. I feel like a queen being hailed by  stalwarts with joy. Cameras flash as I gracefully strike fashionable poses. Photographers look for the best angle. I do different facial expressions and play with my hands and body. I feel like a heavenly goddess being worshiped by human. Runway, make-up, clothes, shoes, photographers, audience, crown, sash, and more! I am no beauty queen nor a supermodel but I used to love these things.

I was a shy girl when I was a kid. Confidence was not seen in me. I was afraid of standing on stage in front of many people. Fast heart beat, I was getting this every time. However, through my family's help, I was able to conquer this fear. They boosted my self-esteem. From there, I embarked on joining different pageants and fashion shows. Until it became a passion.

I won't lie. I grabbed most of the opportunities that came due to my enthusiasm for it. And thanks be to God, I never failed. Well, it doesn't mean I went home with a trophy each time I joined a contest. I won. I lost. But losing is not equivalent to failure. It only means the trophy was not for me. I would consider myself a failure if I did not give my hundred and one percent. I am proud to say, I succeeded in my endeavor and consider myself an achiever.

My age is 20. I am still young and may encounter huge opportunities. However, there was this day when I realized... I am not into this anymore. I've been receiving invitations to join pageants and for photoshoots, but I keep on declining. Slothfulness kicks my butt whenever I receive invitation. Lazy me! Haha! So, I guess I'm gonna halt for a while. Perhaps I will get back to the glare after 2 years for I still have one dream which I haven't achieved yet. I will achieve that with Almighty God's guidance. Watch out for it! :)

Friend VS. Gilfriend/Boyfriend

Bukod sa pamilya, may dalawang taong napakaimportante rin sa ating buhay. Sila ay: si kaibigan at si ka-ibigan. Napakaraming pagkakaparehas ng dalawang ito. Bukod sa parehas ang spelling ng dalawa, may pagkakahawig din sa job description.

Ang kaibigan at ka-ibigan ay parehas nandiyan sa tabi mo palagi. 24 hours silang nandiyan. Kahit hindi mo sila katabi, isang tawag lang o text, darating agad sila. Kapag oras ng kasiyahan, hindi sila nagpapahuli. Pwedeng kasama mo sila mag-shopping, gumimik, maglakwacha, o mag-inuman. Minsan nga kasama mo pa sila sa kalokohan.

Kung kasama mo sila sa panahon ng kasiyahan, syempre mas lalung andiyan sila pag malungkot ka. Si friend at si boyfriend/girlfriend ay willing pakinggan lahat ng hinaing at problema mo. Pwede ka sumandal sa balikat nila para umiyak at gawing tissue ang kanilang damit. Minsan nga sila pa nagiging stress reliever mo. Kapag naman may nang-away sa iyo, para silang sundalong sumusugod kahit anong oras. Tiyak na pagtatanggol ka.

Dami nilang pagkakaparehas, 'di ba? Halos magkaparehas na talaga. Kaya hindi nakakapagtaka na ang isang kaibigan ay maging ka-ibigan mo sa huli. At si boyfie/girlfie naman, isa rin naman siyang kaibigan o bestfriend. Marami mang pagkakaparehas, meron din mga kotexto na magkaiba ang dalawa. May mga bagay na hindi kayang ibigay ni kaibigan pero kaya ni ka-ibigan at may nagagawa si ka-ibigan sa iyo na hindi kayang magawa ni kaibigan. Ano nga ba mga ito?

Lahat ng ibinibigay ng isang friend ay maibibigay ng isang boyfriend/girlfriend, bukod sa natatanging bagay. Ito ay ang KILIG. Tama ako, hindi ba? Kaya ka bang pakiligin ng kaibigan mo? Hindi naman, 'di ba? Pero si boyfie/girlfie, kayang-kaya kang bigyan ng paru-paro sa tiyan.

Samantala, kahit gaano kagaling sa pagpapakilig ang isang boyfie/girlfie, mas lamang parin ang isang friend. Bakit? Kapag ang boyfriend/girlfriend ay nambabae/nanlalake, sobrang masasaktan ka. Pero kapag ang ang friend mo ang gumawa, kahit landiin pa niya lahat ng tao, hinding-hindi ka masasaktan. At ang resulta... Maaari kang iwanan o pagpalit ng ka-ibigan mo, pero ang isang kaibigan? Hinding hindi ka iiwan o ipagpapalit sa iba. Iwanan ka na lahat ng mga babae/lalake at mga naging karelasyon mo, pero ang kaibigan nanatili pa rin sa tabi mo.

P.S. Hindi ko nilalahat ang mga babae at lalaki. May mga kilala akong mababait. At hindi ko rin kwento ito. Ito ay base sa aking obserbasyon lamang. :)

Over

She waited and waited and waited. He will never change. She gave up.

The ball game is OVER.
***

A Hell of a Lot of Tears

It's highly embarrassing that I cry easily over anything. I kid you not. I've been like this ever since I was a kid. When I watch a sad movie, I cry. When I witness a touching scene in person, I cry. And of course, when I part ways with people, whether close to me or not, I cry. Happy thoughts and sad thoughts, whether it be shallow or deep, can make me cry. There are times that I control myself from crying and do not allow my emotion be released 'coz I find it such a shame. But I fail.

This morning, we had our practicum graduation. Take note, a PRACTICUM graduation only. They showed a certain video presentation containing pictures of my Mass Communcation classmates. It triggered some emotions in me and tears began to tremble. And when "Thank You" and "Farewell" songs were played in the background, this time I cried a hell of a lot. My classmates were poking fun at me. Haha! I know the reason behind those tears. It is the fact that I am gonna miss these people whom I spent my college life with in CEU.

I wonder why I am moved easily... Suffering from depression is not the answer for felicity and contentment are in my heart. My blessed life is a proof.

Why am I this way?

Here are some pictures taken during and after the ceremony: (Forgive me for showing the grossest face I've ever had. Just wanna show evidences. Haha!)

Double Chin!